


The Real Meaning

by TheWritingGirl



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, I Don't Even Know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-08-01
Packaged: 2018-03-26 13:29:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3852607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWritingGirl/pseuds/TheWritingGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For years you travelled with him, until you met his wife: River Song.</p><p>Somehow you made the Doctor angry, what will happen now?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Parting

**Author's Note:**

> I don't knoooooow what I am doing with my freetime....
> 
> Hope you like it.

 

„Doctor? Doctor where are you!?!“, running into the TARDIS she

looked around, trying to find the bow tie wearing timelord.

 

„I'm here! What is it (y/n)?“ Sticking out his head from under

the console he gave her a confused look.

 

„I just met River, River Song. Your wife.“ Now curious the Doctor stepped closer, putting his hands on the sides of her arms: „What? Where is she? What did she want?“

 

„You....“, she sighed: „You always said she is a kind, unique person. One of the wonderfullest and strongest woman you ever met.“

 

„Yes, and?“

 

„Well... she told me that she wanted to break up with you.... She said that you two wouldn't fit together. River... River said she never loved you, you were only a little way of passing time.

She wanted me to tell you that after all she just thought of you as another man who fell for her charm...“

 

(y/n) could literally hear his hearts break. He frowned, those bright green eyes of his turned sad and full of emotion. He let his arms fall from her and walked over to the

switches, turning one of them down.

 

Did River really never love him? Was he really just a way of passing time? No, she

would never say something like this. „I need to hear it from her. We are paying her a visit.“

The TARDIS started to rumble and disappeard from its current place, only to

materalize in the 'Stormcage Containment Facility'.

 

Storming out of the doors the timelord walked towards her cell, where she was currently brushing her brownish hair: „Oh, hello Sweetie. What are you doing here? Can't get enough of me-“

„River. Is it true? Do you really not love me? Am I just another man for you?“ Taken aback by his questions she rushed to the bars, taking his hands in hers: „Why should I say something so horrible?

I love you. All of me loves you! I could never break your hearts. Who told you this Doctor?“

 

So... she really loves him? A wave of relieve washed over him, letting his stiff muscles relax.

But wait, why did (y/n) tell him a lie? Why would she want him to be sad? What could she want?

Is it the TARDIS? No, there are other ways. Maybe she is a Zulop who feeds themselfs off of

others sadness? Nah, she doesn't show any signs. But what could it be? Does she want him for

hers- Yes! Of course! Why didn't he noticed earlier? (y/n) always sticks around him,

laughs about all the bad jokes no one ever laughed about and likes all the weird

things he does. Always attentive when he's speaking, making the

TARDIS like her and the most obvious: smiling all the time.

 

How could he be so blind?!? Now she has done it once and for all. Gripping the bars tightly he looked past his wife: „I need to go and take care of a thing.“ Taken by surprise she noticed

the rage in his eyes. Fearing what he would do next she gently stroked his fingers: „Sweetie...“ Turning away from her he started to walk back to his home: „River I have to go. I will visit soon.“

 

That's it. No one shall dare what (y/n) has done. „(Y/N)!“, the Doctor stormed into the TARDIS. „Y...yes?“ The girl hoped that he wasn't too sad about his loss: „How did it go? If you want I can-“

„ **SHUT UP**!“, he now was standing right in front of her. His body covered her and his storming eyes fixed on her face. „How dare you! Do you think this is funny? Do you think that I can't see behind your lies!?!“

„What are you talking about?“ „What I am talking about? You tried to ruin the relationship River and I have! You tried to break us up.“

 

Pointing a finger at your face he continued: „ **YOU**... you tried to kill the last bit of me that isn't completely and utterly unrepairable!“ What? Wait WHAT? „But Doctor! She said she didn't lo-“

„ **JUST SHUT UP**... I can't hear any more of you lies. I will take you home.“ (y/n) was speechless.

 

She didn't do anything wrong. She really saw River. She talked with her. River told her that

she doesn't love him... But why does she lie to him now? „We are here. Get out.“ Even if he

talked calmer now, (y/n) could still feel the fury, the burning hate towards her.

„Doctor, please let me explain!“, she pleaded.

 

Is this how their once wonderful companionship would end? „There is nothing to explain.“ Apperantly yes. Nodding slowly she walked towards the doors and opened them.

Before she stepped out she gave him a last glance and a last, sad smile.

 

„I'm used to it. I'm used to be send away, used to being left out, being the second option. I'm used to being ignored and getting the blame....to be hated.

It's alright. So don't feel bad if you do any of these things to me...

I've learned to endure it... I've learned to keep my expectations low,

just so none of these things matter to me...“

 

A tear rolled down her cheek while a last grin towards him appeared on her face: „But with you... I'm not sure... Goodbye Doctor, have a great life.“ And then she was gone.

 

Running a hand over his face the timelord went back to River, only to see her standing outside

her cell, waiting for him. „Where the HELL have you been?“ „I...I sent (y/n) away. She said she

talked with you and that you said you don't love me. I was blind... how could I not see behind her facade?!? I mean... she was always nice, a bit of a tease, made stupid jokes and tried to

keep up with my rambling. But now...“, a tear leaked and rolled down his cheek:

„She broke my hearts. She betrayed me, our friendship.“

 

Pulling him into a hug River rubbed the back of his head: „Has she told you why she did it?“ Pulling away from her embrace the Doctor looked away. „I- I didn't let her. I didn't wanted to hear anymore from h-“

 

 *** slap** ***** River gave him a slap on the face. „Ow! Why did you do this?!?“ He rubbed the now swelling cheek. „You are a big idiot! First of all: she isn't that kind of person from what I heard from you.

Second you sent her away without letting her explain and third you pratically ripped the heart out of her!“ Getting dangerously close she poked his chest:

„But the worst of all: You. Didn't. Trusted. Her.“

 

Bewildered he let her continue. „Have you thought about the option that maybe someone wanted you two to go seperate ways? That someone wanted you gone to have access to her?

That someone will use her now that she is broken and torn?“ Oh no. Stupid Doctor! Stupid, stupid Doctor! „River, I need to go!“

 

He needs to fix it. He needs to fix what he just fractured. Without (y/n) it wouldn't be the same. The TARDIS would miss her too. It isn't over yet, he can still talk to her, she will listen, he's sure.

 

_Won't she?_

 


	2. The New Cyber Planet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I didn't updated sooner.
> 
> I still hope you like this chapter!

Alone.

 

Alone?

 

She wasn't alone for a long time, always following or followed by him: The Doctor.

 

The Doctor...

 

Tears stung in her eyes, desperately trying to be free, but being hold back by (y/n).

 

A new start, a new life, a new chance.

 

To become better?

 

Answer: Yes.

 

She stroked the TARDIS a last time, feeling her pulsating under the tips of her small fingers.

 

„Take care of this old chap, will you?“

 

A hum echoed in response, making the (h/c) haired woman smile.

 

„Thank you. Oh and before I go: Don't let him ever wear a vegetable again. I saw the photos: even a nice little steak would have fitted better.“

 

Patting the the blue box one last time she made her way. Away from her now destroyed past, left alone and insignificant in this dark, cruel world.

 

A last glance and it was gone.

 

Her once so extraordinary life extinguished, lost in time.

 

„Alright, let's see where I am, since I am pretty sure that this is definitely not earth. Hopefully the TARDIS translator will last long enough for me to get to know this planet even partly...“

 

The surface on which she walked was a reddish brown, everywhere trash. It stank and was just disgusting. The 'people' looked like some kind of octopuses and changed their colors when she walked past them. Seeing a little boy she strode over and kneeled down. Since she only saw his backside (y/n) tapped him on his shoulder.

 

„Hey lil' one, can you tell me where I am?“

 

„You will be assimilated or you shall be deleted.“

 

Turning around the young alien showed his face: weird metallic constructions were plastered across his face, his eyes looked lifeless.

 

„Cybermen...“

 

Suddendly everyone of the inhibitants turned towards her and tried to take her with them.

 

„Oh no, not today Cybies!“

 

Standing up again she could barely dodge those greedy hands before she ran down an alley.

 

„Follow the female. We need the female.“

 

Jumping over what could only be trashbins and garbage bags her blue eyes fixated on her escape route... well the way she tries to use to escape.

 

The sky was brown. Not a healthy brown like fresh dirt, no. A greenish brown, poisoned and dangerous. Behind this nearly disgusting sight was a faint glow of a blue sun.

 

Muttering under her breath about 'OCD people wouldn't like this place one bit' and 'I bet this is could be the TARDIS when I would be away for 4 years' her gaze found a strange building.

 

„This must be the 'cybermen headquarters'... I know this is probably the dumbest idea I ever had even with the trousers incident... but I just need to find out what they're doing here and help those poor people.“

 

She sighed and sneaked her way towards the giant silver mansion.

  
„Damn you Doctor and your infectious personality.“

 

Creeping through the dark alleys and small passages the former time traveller found herself before the back entrance of the giant, metallic building.

 

„That was way too easy...“

 

Suddendly she realized her mistake, but it was too late.

 

„You will be assimilated.“

 

„I should have known.“

 

Cybermats, thousands and more wriggled towards her.

  
„You have informations about the Doctor. You shall lead us. You shall be the new Cyber Leader.“

 

„I would rather die than helping- AAARG“

 

Pain shot through her, unbearable and nearly too much. But this wasn't her biggest problem.

 

„Get out of my head, now!“

 

A high pitches sound echoed through the air, signaling the switch between the cyber part and herself.

 

„He always underastimated you, didn't he? So much unused potential. So much... unused knowledge. Big brain of a leader, many ideas and so many more... strategies against different type of living creatures out there. You listened closely.“

 

_*clank*_

 

„And you won't get any of them. Now: Let. Me. Go.“

 

Inside her head was even more going on. She talked with it: the cyber planner.

 

_'Ohhh, what is that? 36.3% of your memory is used for storing informations about him. The Doctor. I love it! With you the Cybermen can finally spread out and take over the universe._

_With you, dear (y/n) (l/n) the cybermen can be the ruler. And I would be your loyal underling. I could take the time lord, take him and you and me, we could rule this cosmos together. But wait... I found more.'_

 

Her face got darker, eyes glistening with viciousness and insidiousness. A mischievous smile spread across her features, but the most terrifying change was the way she moved.

At first it was considered and soft, but now that she had no longer full control over her body the cyber part took them with hectic and playful strides inside, followed by the already converted residents.

 

_'Don't you want to kill her? Don't you want her to go?'_

 

They entered a giant room, mostly empty but with a long staircase which lead to something like a throne on top.

Smirking all the way up (y/n) clapped her hands together and turned around, facing the cybermen below.

 

„My dear cybermen, soon our time will come, and with it...“

 

She spread out her arms, head held high and an evil laughter escaped her lips:

 

„ **The Doctors Fall!** “

 


	3. The Surprise

„I never should have left her alone. I should have stayed and heard her story.

Why do I always act like this? Impulsive, like a teenager.

I am a over 1000 years old timelord and I still can't protect them!“

 

After he visited River the Doctor sprinted into the TARDIS. Nearly tripping

over his own feet he reached the console and started pressing buttons and

nearly ripping of leavers which made Sexy slightly angry.

 

„I am sorry girl, I know you are angry at me. I should have heard.

But I want, no I need (y/n) to listen to me. Please, just this time:

Help me getting her back.

Please.“

 

His head hang low while he steadied himself on the panel.

He let someone else down. Another person whoms life he broke.

 

**Another friend he lost.**

 

A final flip of the last switch and off he went after the person he learned

to know even more than others. Why didn't he listen? Why didn't he trusted her?

 

_Afraid._

 

He was afraid. Afraid of her. She knew things about him, things he didn't saw in himself.

He is a monster, a mere killer of so many lifes, but she... she saw his friendly self,

the kindness, the man he always wanted to be, the man he thought he couldn't be.

She was there when he lost them: Amy and Rory, Donna, Martha, Rose and even

River.

 

So many years passed, so many lifes were taken because of him. She saw

the best and the worst side of him, she saw impossible things and things even his mind

couldn't comprehend and still: she stayed. Not because of kindness or pity.

 

_But because of him._

 

The TARDIS landed on the planet he abandoned her and walked outside.

Around him layed trash, broken circuits and old, rusty pipes.

As he walked around he avoided the junk hills, fearing that

something or someone could fall onto him.

Surprisingly no one was there. He didn't saw any life form, even the

sonic screwdriver couldn't pick up any, except one.

 

(Y/n).

 

Following the signal he entered a gigantic building. Whatever

happened to the population must be in there and captured her.

 

It was really huge. Everywhere silver walls, empty rooms and corridors.

He walked over half an hour before he reached a dead end, or so he thought.

Suddendly the walls parted, leaving him in a even more larger room,

just like a ball room. Before him was a staircase,

and ontop sat someone on something like a throne...

 

„(Y/N)!“

 

She sat there, her legs dangling from one side while she steadied herself with her

elbow on one of the armrests, eating an apple. He ran towards her,

wanting nothing more than keeping her in his arms and

knowing that she was safe.

 

„(Y/n)! I am sorry! I-“

 

Her head turned towards him. Just then he could see her face fully: on one side

were metallic constructions, covering parts of her sleeve and cheek.

 

„Doctor.“

 

Her skin was pale, (e/c) eyes turned dull and greyish and her hair grew long,

nearly reaching her tight.

 

„How nice to visit us.“

 

A smile played on her lips, evil and treacherous. She stood up, and with a

snap of her fingers the timelord was grabbed by his arms and being escorted towards her.

(y/n) walked slowly down the stairs, the apple still in her hand.

 

„What did you do to her?“

 

Another bite, a low chuckle escaped her throat.

 

„Us? We could ask you the same, mister 'Shut Up'.“

 

Arrived on the bottom of the stairs she shot a glance towards him.

 

„This poor little human girl, getting yelled at and still not wanting to be angry at you.

Do you know how long she already struggles?

Three years, and we couldn't get any informations.

She fights for you until the end Doctor, that is something I really admire about her,

this pure will to keep you and your secrets safe.

Sadly she won't last long anymore, until then. Bye Doctor.“

 

The cybermen which held him, fully converted and ready, dragged him away from

his former friend and into another hallway. Reaching the cells he got thrown into

one and locked away. They took his sonic screwdriver, one guarded the cell

door and one walked away with it.

 

Around him he heard whimpers and crying children, who got quiet when he started yelling.

 

„Let me out! Let me out or I will tell you one thing:

You will regret the decision to ever having layed a hand on her.“

 

No one answered, and no one would for the next few hours, until...

 

„Move.“

 

The timelord was awoken by heavy, metallic feet walking away. Through his still groggy eyes he could see a female.

 

„(y/n)? Are you there?“

 

The door was opened and inside stepped indeed, (y/n).

 

„Doctor you need to get out here. I don't know how long I- Nnnhg...“

 

She grabbed her head and steadied herself with her other hand on a wall.

 

„I won't leave you. (y/n) I am sorry for what I said, I just...

I just thought that I would loose another person dear to me.

I never wanted to yell at you but I did and I regret it.

Please forgive me.“

 

His friend opened one eye, shot him a slight smile and gave him back the screwdriver.

 

„Leave Doctor. Take the remaining living people from their

cells and leave. I will take care of the cybermen.“

 

However, before she could proceed the Doctor grabbed her sleeve

and glanced determined at her.

 

„Promise me you come back so we can talk-“

 

„I can't promise you something like this when I don't know the end.

I am sorry.“

 

Yanking away her arm she ran through the corridors and away from the time traveller.

 

Hoping that she was right he freed the 'people' and took them with him.

After sneaking around they finally reached a teleport platform where

he transported everyone excluding himself as far away as possible.

 

„Hello Sweetie.“

 

He knew this voice too well. Turning slowly around his green eyes found hers. Holding a plasma gun in her hand she aimed it at him.

 

„ _River_...“

 


	4. The Chrono Wave

„Doctor, you need to come with me, now!“

 

„I can't, I-“

 

Without hesitation River released the safety catch of her gun and motioned for him to come over to her.

 

„I'm sorry, but you don't have a choice in this.“

 

Reluctantly he obeyed. Even if she points a weapon at him, he trusts her.

 

„River. We need to help (y/n)! She is being controlled by cybermen. We-“

 

„Doctor, (y/n) asked me to come here.“

 

„What?“

 

The couple stepped out of the Cyber building, where they ran through cybermen without stopping and onto a hill.

 

„Doctor...“

 

Together they arrived at the highest point, where they could see the hugeness of the conquerors. Millions of the metallic soldiers stood operational in more than thousand groups together, like a giant army. Silver ships, which stood on the sidelines and ready to transport them were put into place, but in the distance, before the headquaters was a known person: (y/n).

 

„ _River? River can you hear me?_ “

 

Out of her pocket the blonde woman grabbed a black Walkie-Talkie, which was also a bit damaged. Looking towards their friend she pushed a button.

 

„We are here, are you ready?“

 

A light scratching was heard out of the speaker, then silence. Five minutes did River and the Doctor wait for an answer, until they finally head the familiar voice of (y/n).

 

„ _I am ready, release the chrono wave._ “

 

Understanding what they wanted to do he stepped before his wife looking dangerously into her eyes, his face only inches apart from hers.

 

„That is why you needed the gun, to get me away and into a safe distance. Forget it, cancel it. I won't allow another person I know to die. If you release this chrono wave not only the cybermen will die, but (y/n) too!“

 

He waited for an answer, an explanation for all this, but he didn't received one.

 

„ _River, why does it take you so long? Does he make problems as expected?_ “

 

Forcefully he takes the Walkie-Talkie out of Rivers hand and looks over to (y/n), who also holds something in her hand now.

 

„(y/n) listen to me: I am sure that there are other ways. If you just stand there and the wave hits you, then you will...“

 

The timelord rubbed his eyes and sighed.

 

„Just give me some time for a plan, please.“

 

Silence again. River layed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. The only thing she wanted is for him to understand that there was no other way than this one.

 

„Doctor she has got an exoshield which will shield her from most of the waves power. We haven't tested it yet, but-“

 

„ **SHE COULD DIE, RIVER!** ...she could die.“

 

His short outburst of range suddendly changed into sadness, tears started to form in his eyes from the thought of loosing her.

 

„She was the one, who was always there when I needed someone. When I lost Rose back then I also lost my purpose of life. I thought about what of a life mine is: I find friends, we have fun together and share the joy of travelling together and joint happiness but then everything just disappears again. Either they die, go by themselfs, find someone else or don't remember you... I had lost my hope, I just wanted to disappear from everything: the pain, the loss and the guilt... But then I met her.“

 

Even with tears in his eyes he begun smiling, when he remembers the first encounter with this wondeful, unique person.

 

„It was in my previous regeneration. Just a few hours ago I said my last goodbyes to Rose at the Bad Wolf Bay. I felt like doing nothing, so I travelled a last time with the TARDIS around the world, just to watch the humans being alive. My last stop was her hometown (h/t). I don't exactly knew why I chose this place, but it was one of the greatest choices I ever made.“

 

The time traveller sat down on a protruding boulder a bit further away, just to let out a light laugh.

 

„I was stepping out of the TARDIS when she ran into me with a water bomb, which exploded between us. At first I was a bit angered, but when I heard her laugh I couldn't just stay mad. We introduced each other, somehow she found out I was sad and asked me why, whereupon I answered that I just lost a dear friend of mine. Without asking further she grabbed my hand and dragged me around the area.“

 

River sat down beside him and listened closely. It was rare, that he talked about his past, especially companions. And even if he would talk for a few minutes, it wouldn't change or affect their plan.

 

„She showed me around and made some stupid but funny jokes, we layed down and looked at the clouds, picking some out and talking about them. She invited me to her home where we cooked something... well she nearly set ablaze her kitchen if I weren't there. You should have seen her face when the fire was finally put out. Even I couldn't hide my laughter at that moment.“

 

His gaze wandered over to the opposite side of the army, where (y/n) stood.

 

„It was really late when we were finished with cleaning. She asked, if I wanted to sleep there. Because of the chaos and the events of the past days I hadn't slept and because the TARDIS was relatively far away I accepted. (y/n) instisted, that I would sleep in her bed because it would be really rude to let the guest sleep on the hard couch. So I layed down and was already nearly asleep, when she kissed my forehead and whispered: 'A laughter suits you way better, Doctor. If not for you or me, do it for her, okay?'“

 

He looked at his hands, where he held a picture with himself and the others: Jack, Rose, Donna, Martha, Mickey, K9, Sarah Jane, the metacrisis Doctor and of course (y/n). Cautiously he rubbed his thumb over it, a moment of peace washed over the timelord.

  
„When I awoke the next morning I saw her still sleeping, but on the floor. She looked so peaceful and calm, not chaotic and loony like when I met her. Later that day I made my way back, accompanied by (y/n) who told me a bit about herself and her family, whom I already met. Nice people by the way, a bit too protective maybe. Anyway, I showed her the TARDIS and her reaction was surprising. 'She's beautiful! But really Doctor, you should clean at least once or twice.' I couldn't shut my mouth. She laughed about my face and told me that if I keep my mouth shut, flies won't get in.“

 

Urgently his eyes fixed on the (h/c) girl between himself and Sarah Jane.

 

„She started travelling with me, however always just for a few days. 'Come here when you need a companion', were her words. In between I then met Martha, Donna and everyone else... And everytime I was dreary again she cheered me up, no matter how long she needed. (y/n) was always shining, like the sun. Well I thought so.“

 

„One night i visited her, just to talk to each other again and maybe to check up on her. I landed in her living room when I heard a quiet sob. Quickly I ran towards it, and saw her huddled up in a corner in her bedroom. Because I didn't know what to do about it I just did what I needed to do, I took her in my arms and cradled her head gently, just like she did all the times. After a while she started laughing, even if it sounded forced because of the tears. She told me that she never cried before someone ever, that I was the first one. She didn't wanted someone to worry about her.“

 

While he told his wife the story of his probably best friend he had packed away the photo and stood up, already taking in his normal stance.

 

„Do you now know why I do not want to loose her? She gives me hope, just like you give me a mystery to solve: yourself. So: Are you sure that the exoshield will work?“

 

The scratching noise of the Walkie-Talkie was heard again.

 

„ _Are you asleep over there? Shall I set up an alarm clock and wake you?_ “

 

„We are ready, (y/n).“

 

„ _All right! The exoshield is activated, I'm just waiting for the wave. Give it to me, River! …wait that sounded wrong._ “

 

Standing beside River when she pressed the button, the Doctor whispered a little 'Geronimo' and the chrono wave swept through the cybermen, which collapsed fast and painless. (y/n) still stood on the same place, arms outstretched and ready to receive the whole power of the wave.

 

„ _You can do it (y/n). You've gone through worse. As example when you and the Doctor swapped bodies and he asked how women can survive with that extra weight on the chest._ “

 

She smiled at the memory, when the wave hit her.

 


	5. The Real Meaning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!IMPORTANT!!!
> 
> Please listen to this song while reading. I marked when you should start it! :)
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_zEF22q3hA&index=116&list=PL7ek-Dkg5sUfJ0dscwAXVU13Tk3TrzR2j&shuffle=28396

_'It's so quiet.... so dark.'_

 

_'Why can't I see? Why can't I hear?'_

 

_'Am I dead?'_

 

* * *

 

_'Voices. I can faintly hear them, so far away. They are calling me. They call my name.'_

 

_'Who is it? Why can't I answer?'_

 

_'I am surrounded by emptiness, lost in its infiniteness.'_

 

* * *

 

 

_'But... the voices get louder, they are approaching.'_

 

„(Y/n), can yo _u hea_...“

 

_'Doctor?'_

 

„I am... alive?“

 

The (h/c) blinked one time, then a second one, slowly opening her eyes and taking in her sourroundings.

 

She layed on her back, staring at the green sky above. In between was a big hole, letting the blue moon sent a calming light down onto the planet.

 

„So beautiful.“

 

A faint smile played on her lips as she watches the stars glimming in the distance, creating an unique sight even for her, who has seen the universe many times even closer.

 

„ _(y/n)? Are you there? (y/n)?_ “

 

Beside her layed the walkie-talkie which emmits the Doctors worried voice. Weakly she grabs the device and holds it beside her mouth, breathing in the now fresh air.

 

„(y/n) here... We made it.“

 

She could hear them cheer, their happy laughters flooding the air and making the whole atmosphere even more breathtaking. They made it.

 

Her limbs ached, but she still wanted to stand up, still wanted to take them in her arms, still wanted to see their faces, to see her friends.

 

„I'll come over... wait for me there.“

 

Throwing the gadget away (y/n) hoisted her upper body up, her arms tingle but in a good way. Carefully balling her fists she looks down at them and smiles.

 

„We made it.“

 

Her whole body was covered in dirt, sticking on her clothes, her hair, limbs and face. She ignored the pain when she stood up, and even when it screamed at her to stop when she limped her way towards the Doctor and River, past the collapsed bodies of dead cybermen and innocent but also dead people who where imprisoned in them, one hand covering her left side and her body slightly tilted.

 

They waited for her in the middle of the battlefield, smiling at the oncoming girl. The Doctor stepped a bit forward, streching out his arms and grinning even wider when he saw that she was only about 40 feet away.

 

„Doctor...We made it.“

 

Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes and he nodded, still grinning at his companion.

 

„Come here.“

 

Without hesitation she obeyed and cautiously placed her arms around his torso, feeling his warmth and his tight embrace, like he never wanted to let her go again, as he pulled her into a hug.

 

Muffled he started to speak up, his face covered by the crook of her neck.

 

„I nearly lost you... again.“

 

Warm liquid made its way down her throat as the Doctor quietly started to let tears flow. Faintly chuckling to herself she patted his back with one hand while the other gently stroked the back of his head.

 

„You are still such a crybaby, silly Doctor.“

 

He pulled away. His face was red and wet from tears, but smiling again. He held her by the shoulders and chuckled himself.

 

„Thank you, (y/n).“

 

„Thank you? For what?“

 

„For surviving. For being here.“

 

Her smile turned into a smirk when she ruffled his brown hair playful, the aching almost gone.

 

„Anytime again, Chinny.“

 

„Oi! My chin isn't that big!“

 

Rubbing his chin in fake hurt his gaze softened by her laughter, and even River started smiling at the comment.

 

He finally had found his purpose, finally found a reason to fight and live.

 

(Y/n).

 

After her laughter died (y/n) opened her eyes, only to run towards River.

 

„ **WATCH OUT, RIVER** “

 

The blonde woman turned around, just to see a lifted cyberman arm pointing his gun towards her. Her eyes widen, she couldn't dodge it.

 

Just as the laser should have hit her she saw (y/n) pushing her aside and getting the beam herself. River stumbled a bit but caught herself, (y/n) however fell down and layed sprawled out on the dirt.

 

„ **NO! (Y/N)!** “

 

 

 

**\----Now you can start the music!----**

 

 

 

Running over to her the Doctor turned her around so her head layed on his lap and he could see her face. Panicking he took her cheeks with his long, slender hands and stroked them.

 

„Come on (y/n), you can't die. Not now, not after all we've gone through.“

 

She weakly opens her eyes, the (e/c) in them were shining like never before, they were just so warm and welcoming. A faint smile spread across her lips as she looked up into his sorrowful, green orbs which let out tears again.

 

„ Jeez Doctor you are crying again.“

 

She tried to laugh, but it ended up in her coughing up blood , which was then trickling down the side of her face.

 

„Blood tastes awful as ever....“

 

„Don't strain yourself. River and I will carry you into the T.A.R.D.I.S. and there we will fix-“

 

(y/n) gently put a finger on his lips and gave him a look.

 

„We both know that I won't make it. Don't try to-“

 

She coughed again, this time even harder.

 

„....I'm sorry Doctor... I'm sorry I can't stay any longer.... I just wanted you to smile again.“

 

He bowed foward so his forehead touched her belly. He tried to contain it but started crying even harder.

 

„(y/n), you were the most precious, kindest and lovable companion I ever had. Thank you. Thank you for the wonderful time.“

 

A last time she heaved up her arms and touched his chest, where his hearts were.

 

„Do you know the real meaning? The meaning of why I travelled with you?“

 

The Doctor stopped moving, stopped crying and just listened.

 

„The real meaning... I wanted to show you happiness, which can be found everywhere, counting in the joy which is always accompanied by pain and loss. Do you understand what I want to say?“

 

He shook his head, the tears blurring his vision.

 

„Doctor, I mean that you are never alone. Rose, Martha, Donna, Amy and Rory and everyone else...“

 

She patted the spots where her hands could barely hold themself.

  
„...we are all right here. We will always be there, guarding you and wanting you to be happy.“

 

Now tears also appeared in her face, she tried to fight them but she ended up just giving him a last smile while she let her arms fall.

 

„Doctor, we all...“

 

She closed her eyes and breathes out, the smile still staying.

 

„...we all love you.“

 

 


	6. Goodbye, River

On the dead land, far far away from Sol 3, also known as earth is a broken man.

A man who just lost the most important person in his life.

 

His friend whom he loved even more than his own kind.

 

He is crying, saying 'I am sorry' over and over again, as if he wouldn't know any other.

He still holds her in his arms, rocking back and forth.

He still loves her.

 

„I'm sorry (y/n), I am sorry.“

 

A blonde woman with wild, curly hair stands beside him.

She is watching him, just as sad.

Not because of jealousy or anger, but because one of her best friends just died,

she also needs to leave him, something that means to happen this day.

 

Leaving him alone.

 

* * *

 

 

„Sweetie...“

 

She kneels down beside him, laying a hand on his shoulder for comfort.

 

„River-“

 

His voice cracks.

 

„We need to bury her. We need to-“

 

River hugs him, burying her head in the crook of his neck.

The Doctor does the same, just letting all the tears out,

kneeling with her, beside their sobbing, in complete silence.

 

* * *

 

 

Minutes passed, neither of them moving, only their noises died down,

leaving the both of them in comforting calmness.

 

The timelord is the first standing up, still wiping away the tears.

Shortly after River follows, looking around and realizing that it was now night.

 

„We should pick her up. I need to inform her family and then...

We will find a nice place for her.“

 

River glances sadly down at the body, a last tear escaping her eyes.

 

„We should try and forget-“

 

„I can't just try to forget, when she gave me so much to remember, River.“

 

* * *

 

 

The blonde looked towards the entrance of the building in which (y/n) was imprisoned,

not only there, but also in her own body.

 

To her surprise someone stands before it, someone she doesn't expect to see there.

 

„Doctor, look.“

 

The male turns his head, only to widen his eyes.

 

„That is-“

 

„The one who caused all of this, I know.“

 

Another River Song, or Melody Pond faces them.

The one who killed (y/n).

She walks towards them, yet there is something different about her,

like she doesn't know how to.

 

* * *

 

 

A few feet away she stops, just looking at them with her empty eyes.

It is as if she isn't alive, yet she can walk, and apparently speak.

 

„We are squadron 10-Z-82-Delta, our main function is supporting.“

 

All of sudden the Doctor leaps forwards, anger visible and nearly boiling over.

 

„You! Because of you (y/n) is-...

You just killed someone I really like,

this is not a safe place to stay.“

 

„Information is processing . . . Finished.“

 

The 'River clone' holds up her hand, glowing particles fly towards the timelord.

 

„Ohhhhh, you- No! Not me, scan River!“

 

„Scans completed, final stage initialized.“

 

As he tried to grab the clone it vanished into million of golden lights,

only to fly over to (y/n)'s dead body.

 

„NO!“

 

River and him watch the body, which was now slightly floating over the ground.

Her wounds heal, as if she was never injured, her hair grows back to how it was a year ago,

and even her weight turns normal.

 

„Doctor, what are those?“

 

* * *

 

 

Circling around her the glowing essence finally enters (y/n)'s body which is then laying

on the ground again, as if nothing happened.

 

„Nanobots. Encountered them more than once, never seen them taking a physical form.“

 

„And what does this mean for (y/n)?“

 

Just as the words left Rivers mouth, the (h/c) haired girl shoots up, wide eyed and

a shocked expression with it.

  
„Eek, There's something on my back!“

 

Patting away the dust a bug-like creature falls off her back, quickly crawling away.

 

„It's this small? Wait. Maybe it is dangerous! Am I poisoned or something worse?“

 

Wanting to get up quickly her legs give away and she lands flat on her face.

(y/n) laughs about her own clumsiness and strokes her hair away from her vision.

 

„I really need to learn how to human.“

 

But when she looks up she meets with two pair of eyes looking surpised at her.

Finally remembering why they make those faces her mouth forms an 'o'.

 

„I should be dead. I SHOULD BE DEAD! Waaaaait. I am a zombie, I always wanted to be one!“

 

„Incredible...“

 

River whispers. The Doctor is just as surprised as her.

Not only did they defeat the cybermen again,

but (y/n) is alive!

 

„Take a picture it will last longer. But seriously, could you help me up?

The ground is a bit cold and rough.“

 

Without hesitation the timelord throws himself at her and pulls her into a bone crushing hug, nearly succeeding with it.

River on the other hand pulls a vortex manipulator out of her pocket.

 

„It's time, sweetie.“

 

He pulls away being confused with the curly haired, before realizing and looking sadly.

 

„So, this will be the last time I see you?“

 

She nods, tears forming in her eyes.

 

„I love you Doctor, but I know that there is someone who will be there for you even longer than everyone else. Become happy with her, and think about me sometimes, will you.“

 

„But I love-“

 

„You love her even more, you silly man. Promise me to never let her go. She's good for you.“

 

(y/n) is still confused. About whom are they talking? The Doctor looks down at the female in his arms, before glancing back at River, a sad smile on her face.

 

„Of course. And you promise me to not do criminal things again.“

 

„Spoilers.“

 

Shooting him a last wink and kiss she presses a button and vanishes into thin air.

 

* * *

 

 

Trying to comprehend the whole thing (y/n) looks up at her friend.

 

„Why am I alive? What did she mean by last time? And who is this person whom you love more than her? Is that even possible? Well, from what I've seen it is definitely-“

 

He gently places his index finger on her lips, smiling slightly.

 

„You were rescued by an emergency squadron of nanobots. They revived you. For River...“

 

His gaze wanders up, where he watches the blue clouds flying through the green sky.

 

„ ...We knew that one day, it would be our last meeting. And this day is today.“

 

His smile turns sadder, his eyes now locking with hers.

 

„I'm sorry (y/n)... but you are a timelady now.“

 


	7. End and Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 1k reads and 50 kudos, you guys are amazing! \\(°-°\\)
> 
>  
> 
> This will be the last chapter, I hope you have fun!

„A timelady? A female timelord? Are you sure?“ 

 

The Doctor gently takes her hands and places them over her now two hearts. 

 

„Can you feel it? Two heartbeats, two hearts beating only for your well being.“ 

 

(y/n)s mouth opens as if she wants to say something. She can feel them pulsate in her chest, rhythmic and strong. Breathless about this discovery 

she clutches her shirt,  staring straight forward. 

 

„I've got two hearts...“ 

 

While she tries to comprehend the discovery the floppy haired male bathes in guilt. 

Because of him, she can at no time live like a normal human again, 

not once experience how it is to grow old and- 

 

„You still think this is your fault, am I right?“ 

 

His eyes widen a bit, before closing somewhat as he nodded in response. 

Lifting his somewhat shaking hands the timelord glances at them sadly. 

 

„You could have become so much more. You could have become a savior for your planet, 

or an everyday life hero. A lawyer, or a vet, maybe even a teacher but now-“ 

 

His voice cracks, his gaze still fixated. 

 

„You and me, we are the only ones left. I, being the killer of over 2.47 billion Gallifreyan 

children, destroyer of so many lifes and you a transformed human girl at the 

beginning of her new life who doesn't even know that I-“ 

 

This attracts her attention. 

 

„That you what?“ 

 

The Doctor sighs deeply, before chuckling to himself. 

   
„I can't believe that I am saying those words again after all the centuries. (y/n) I love you. 

I never realized it because of the loss of Rose, all the chaos with the Master and 

suddenly River appeared again. I only recently noticed this, like her... 

In the end I couldn't tell you because I didn't wanted 

to hurt River or lose you. And after telling you all of this I just became aware of the fact what a 

selfish person I really am. In the end, all I can do is hurt the people around me.“ 

 

He closed his eyes, waiting for her to say something that 

will damage his hearts even more, leaving him alone again in this big universe, 

devastated and lonely. What he didn't expect is a hand intertwining with his, 

the thumb gently stroking his hand. As he opens his eyes and flickers them over to her face, 

he was met with a genuine smile. 

 

„You really are slow, aren't you? All the adventures, every day and night, no matter 

when and where we were, I always admired you, Doctor. To be honest I already gave up trying 

to be something more than 'just friends'. Every time I could see you smile...“ 

 

(y/n) raises her unoccupied hand and strokes the hair out of his face: 

 

„...was enough to make me happy and forget how I really felt. However, hearing your confession now, 

I really don't know what to answer.“ 

  

His nearly non existing eyebrows shoot up before he hugs her, not wanting to 

let go for the next few minutes. Even so, while he does that (y/n) tries to survive this sudden attack, 

feeling the lack of something important. 

  

„Doctor even if I am a timelady now oxygen is still one of my best buddies, 

and he doesn't like it if he can't visit my lungs.“ 

 

„Right, sorry.“ 

 

Abruptly letting go and without any second thought, he smashes his lips against her, 

nearly head butting the female. (y/n), who is surprised at first doesn't do anything, 

but after feeling his disappointment, she tries to respond back, which seems to 

work since the Doctor now smiles into the kiss before pulling away and resting his 

forehead against hers, staring deep into her shining, but still slightly confused eyes (e/c) eyes. 

 

„Well.... that escalated quickly. What about River?“ 

   
„She told us to love each other. After all, she would be angry with me if we wouldn't do 

this kind of kissing stuff and dancing or roller skating or what 

humans normally do when they love each other.“ 

 

Shooting him a 'are-you-serious' look he finally shut up, before both stand 

up and walk back to the T.A.R.D.I.S. 

 

„So... another adventure?“ 

 

„I thought you would never ask!“ 

 

* * *

 

London, England, Sol 3 also known as earth in the year 2017, 

two aliens visit the Thames, feeding ducks. 

 

„Doctor I told you not to feed them! I want to take a photo!“ 

 

(y/n) holds a camera in her hands, a pout on her face. She tries to take the perfect picture 

for the last 30 minutes, but her boyfriend has a different opinion. 

 

„Come here duckies, come to the friendly Doctor.“ 

 

A big grin stands since the beginning on his face, which won't leave sooner or later. 

He just loves to tease her. 

 

„I only want to take a picture of them and their cute little chirps, but you're drawing them away. 

Just one tiny picture!“ 

 

„Not a chance!" 

 

„Doctor!“ 

 

(y/n) starts chuckling, which also infects him. 

Since there aren't many people around at this time of the day they were alone, 

just them and the ducks. 

 

Giving up trying to take one she sits down on a bench, not very far away. Just now, she realizes what a perfect motive is before her: 

her best friend, and since some time also boyfriend, 

is feeding some adorable ducks, looking as lovable as ever. 

 

* * *

 

Later that day both strolled through the streets, talking and laughing to each other. 

 

„...and then I said 'Look at me! I am a target!'“ 

 

„I know, stupid. I was there. Nevertheless, it really was hilarious; you should have seen Amys face!“ 

 

After a while, their laughter died down, leaving them in a comfortable silence. 

 

„Say (y/n), today is the day you become 300, do you want to do anything special?“ 

 

Waiting some time for a reply he notices that (y/n) isn't even listening. Trying to get 

her attention, he waves a hand before her eyes. 

 

„Oi, somebody home?“ 

 

„Oh? Sorry, I'm just really tired, nothing to worry about.“ 

 

„Then let's go to sleep, tomorrow is a new day.“ 

 

Nodding in agreement they intertwine their hands and walk back. When they arrived about 10 

minutes later they change into their pajamas and hop into bed, where (y/n) quickly falls asleep. 

Looking at her while she sleeps the Doctor gently strokes some hair out of her face, admiring 

how soft and partly pink her cheeks are. 

 

Little by little getting tired himself, he pulls her into him, trapping her between his arms, her head resting against his chest. Slowly closing his eyes, he just manages one last sentence. 

 

„I love you, my little fighter.“   

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this story!
> 
> Sorry if there are any misspellings or badly written parts,  
> this is still one of my first fanfictions. 
> 
> But don't worry, I will definitely try to improve!
> 
> \- TheWritingGirl


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